{"title":"Anti-Corporate Christmas","description":"\u003ch1 data-end=\"610\" data-start=\"532\"\u003e🎄🔥 \u003cstrong data-end=\"610\" data-start=\"539\"\u003eANTI-CORPORATE CHRISTMAS \u003c\/strong\u003e\n\u003c\/h1\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1020\" data-start=\"612\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"640\" data-start=\"612\"\u003eAnti-Corporate Christmas\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr data-end=\"643\" data-start=\"640\"\u003eWelcome to the side of the holidays they don’t put on TV. This is where the fake cheer cracks, the corporate greed shows, and the real punks come out to celebrate on their own terms. \u003cstrong data-end=\"854\" data-start=\"826\"\u003eAnti-Corporate Christmas\u003c\/strong\u003e is KLF’s unapologetic middle finger to holiday conformity — raw art, bold statements, and designs built for anyone who’s tired of pretending December isn’t a circus.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1153\" data-start=\"1022\"\u003eThis isn’t cozy-family-matching-pajamas energy.\u003cbr data-end=\"1072\" data-start=\"1069\"\u003eThis is \u003cstrong data-end=\"1153\" data-start=\"1080\"\u003e“I’m here for chaos, cookies, and calling out the corporate machine.”\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1201\" data-start=\"1155\"\u003eEvery tee in this collection is engineered to:\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul data-end=\"1492\" data-start=\"1203\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"1241\" data-start=\"1203\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1241\" data-start=\"1205\"\u003eCut through the fake holiday shine\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"1290\" data-start=\"1242\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1290\" data-start=\"1244\"\u003eCall out the commercialization of everything\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"1331\" data-start=\"1291\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1331\" data-start=\"1293\"\u003eDeliver loud, neon-heavy punk energy\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"1400\" data-start=\"1332\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1400\" data-start=\"1334\"\u003eHelp you survive mandatory parties with minimal emotional damage\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"1492\" data-start=\"1401\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1492\" data-start=\"1403\"\u003eGive you something better than the same Target Christmas trash everyone else is wearing\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1650\" data-start=\"1494\"\u003eWear these to your office party and become a legend.\u003cbr data-end=\"1549\" data-start=\"1546\"\u003eWear them with family and trigger your uncle.\u003cbr data-end=\"1597\" data-start=\"1594\"\u003eWear them anywhere the world expects you to behave.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1735\" data-start=\"1652\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"1687\" data-start=\"1652\"\u003eThis year, Christmas goes punk.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr data-end=\"1690\" data-start=\"1687\"\u003e🖤🎄⚡ \u003cstrong data-end=\"1735\" data-start=\"1696\"\u003eKLF Streetwear — Offend With Style.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-end=\"1740\" data-start=\"1737\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-end=\"1792\" data-start=\"1742\"\u003e🔗 \u003cstrong data-end=\"1792\" data-start=\"1748\"\u003eLooking For More Chaos? Check These Out:\u003c\/strong\u003e\n\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cul data-end=\"2081\" data-start=\"1794\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"1889\" data-start=\"1794\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1889\" data-start=\"1796\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"1827\" data-start=\"1796\"\u003eLit From The Pit Collection\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr data-end=\"1830\" data-start=\"1827\"\u003e\u003ca href=\"https:\/\/kuntsliveforever.com\/collections\/lit-from-the-pit\" class=\"decorated-link\" rel=\"noopener\" data-end=\"1887\" data-start=\"1830\"\u003ehttps:\/\/kuntsliveforever.com\/collections\/lit-from-the-pit\u003cspan class=\"ms-0.5 inline-block align-middle leading-none\" aria-hidden=\"true\"\u003e\u003csvg class=\"block h-[0.75em] w-[0.75em] stroke-current stroke-[0.75]\" data-rtl-flip=\"\" xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\" fill=\"currentColor\" viewbox=\"0 0 20 20\" height=\"20\" width=\"20\"\u003e\u003cpath d=\"M14.3349 13.3301V6.60645L5.47065 15.4707C5.21095 15.7304 4.78895 15.7304 4.52925 15.4707C4.26955 15.211 4.26955 14.789 4.52925 14.5293L13.3935 5.66504H6.66011C6.29284 5.66504 5.99507 5.36727 5.99507 5C5.99507 4.63273 6.29284 4.33496 6.66011 4.33496H14.9999L15.1337 4.34863C15.4369 4.41057 15.665 4.67857 15.665 5V13.3301C15.6649 13.6973 15.3672 13.9951 14.9999 13.9951C14.6327 13.9951 14.335 13.6973 14.3349 13.3301Z\"\u003e\u003c\/path\u003e\u003c\/svg\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/a\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"1990\" data-start=\"1891\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1990\" data-start=\"1893\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"1927\" data-start=\"1893\"\u003eSatire \/ Minimalist Collection\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr data-end=\"1930\" data-start=\"1927\"\u003e\u003ca class=\"decorated-link cursor-pointer\" rel=\"noopener\" data-end=\"1988\" data-start=\"1930\"\u003ehttps:\/\/kuntsliveforever.com\/collections\/satire-minimalist\u003cspan class=\"ms-0.5 inline-block align-middle leading-none\" aria-hidden=\"true\"\u003e\u003csvg class=\"block h-[0.75em] w-[0.75em] stroke-current stroke-[0.75]\" data-rtl-flip=\"\" xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\" fill=\"currentColor\" viewbox=\"0 0 20 20\" height=\"20\" width=\"20\"\u003e\u003cpath d=\"M14.3349 13.3301V6.60645L5.47065 15.4707C5.21095 15.7304 4.78895 15.7304 4.52925 15.4707C4.26955 15.211 4.26955 14.789 4.52925 14.5293L13.3935 5.66504H6.66011C6.29284 5.66504 5.99507 5.36727 5.99507 5C5.99507 4.63273 6.29284 4.33496 6.66011 4.33496H14.9999L15.1337 4.34863C15.4369 4.41057 15.665 4.67857 15.665 5V13.3301C15.6649 13.6973 15.3672 13.9951 14.9999 13.9951C14.6327 13.9951 14.335 13.6973 14.3349 13.3301Z\"\u003e\u003c\/path\u003e\u003c\/svg\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/a\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"2081\" data-start=\"1992\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"2081\" data-start=\"1994\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"2022\" data-start=\"1994\"\u003eCore Identity Collection\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr data-end=\"2025\" data-start=\"2022\"\u003e\u003ca class=\"decorated-link cursor-pointer\" rel=\"noopener\" data-end=\"2079\" data-start=\"2025\"\u003ehttps:\/\/kuntsliveforever.com\/collections\/core-identity\u003cspan class=\"ms-0.5 inline-block align-middle leading-none\" aria-hidden=\"true\"\u003e\u003csvg class=\"block h-[0.75em] w-[0.75em] stroke-current stroke-[0.75]\" data-rtl-flip=\"\" xmlns=\"http:\/\/www.w3.org\/2000\/svg\" fill=\"currentColor\" viewbox=\"0 0 20 20\" height=\"20\" width=\"20\"\u003e\u003cpath d=\"M14.3349 13.3301V6.60645L5.47065 15.4707C5.21095 15.7304 4.78895 15.7304 4.52925 15.4707C4.26955 15.211 4.26955 14.789 4.52925 14.5293L13.3935 5.66504H6.66011C6.29284 5.66504 5.99507 5.36727 5.99507 5C5.99507 4.63273 6.29284 4.33496 6.66011 4.33496H14.9999L15.1337 4.34863C15.4369 4.41057 15.665 4.67857 15.665 5V13.3301C15.6649 13.6973 15.3672 13.9951 14.9999 13.9951C14.6327 13.9951 14.335 13.6973 14.3349 13.3301Z\"\u003e\u003c\/path\u003e\u003c\/svg\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/a\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","products":[{"product_id":"klf-merry-late-fees-anti-corporate-christmas-long-sleeve","title":"KLF \"Merry Late Fees\" – Anti-Corporate Christmas Long Sleeve","description":"\u003cp data-start=\"0\" data-end=\"60\"\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"62\" data-end=\"394\"\u003eChristmas used to be about giving a damn. Now it’s about watching your bank app have a panic attack while you pretend maxing out another card is “making memories.”\u003cbr data-start=\"225\" data-end=\"228\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"228\" data-end=\"247\"\u003eMerry Late Fees\u003c\/strong\u003e is the shirt for everyone who’s done being emotionally blackmailed by holiday ads, “doorbusters,” and family guilt trips disguised as “tradition.”\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"396\" data-end=\"647\"\u003eSanta’s not sliding down chimneys this year—he’s getting crushed under a pile of credit cards just like the rest of us. Wear this to the family party, the office “secret Santa,” or straight into Walmart on December 23rd and let the art do the talking.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"649\" data-end=\"770\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"649\" data-end=\"696\"\u003eLIMITED RUN – PRINTED ONLY UNTIL JANUARY 1.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr data-start=\"696\" data-end=\"699\"\u003eNo reprints. No restocks. When the calendar flips, this design is dead.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"772\" data-end=\"775\"\u003e\n\u003ch3 data-start=\"777\" data-end=\"788\"\u003eDetails\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"789\" data-end=\"1282\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"789\" data-end=\"834\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"791\" data-end=\"834\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"791\" data-end=\"801\"\u003eColor:\u003c\/strong\u003e Black only (because obviously)\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"835\" data-end=\"895\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"837\" data-end=\"895\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"837\" data-end=\"847\"\u003ePrint:\u003c\/strong\u003e Full front DTF print, crisp detail, soft hand\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"896\" data-end=\"997\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"898\" data-end=\"997\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"898\" data-end=\"909\"\u003eFabric:\u003c\/strong\u003e 100% cotton (fiber content may vary slightly by color family, but this drop is BLACK)\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"998\" data-end=\"1063\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1000\" data-end=\"1063\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1000\" data-end=\"1011\"\u003eWeight:\u003c\/strong\u003e Medium 6.0 oz\/yd² (203 g\/m²) – sturdy, not flimsy\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1064\" data-end=\"1100\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1066\" data-end=\"1100\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1066\" data-end=\"1074\"\u003eFit:\u003c\/strong\u003e Classic fit long sleeve\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1101\" data-end=\"1159\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1103\" data-end=\"1159\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1103\" data-end=\"1113\"\u003eLabel:\u003c\/strong\u003e Sewn-in label (no cheap tear-away nonsense)\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1160\" data-end=\"1282\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1162\" data-end=\"1282\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1162\" data-end=\"1171\"\u003eNote:\u003c\/strong\u003e Runs a bit smaller than usual – if you’re between sizes or want extra room for post-dinner bloat, \u003cstrong data-start=\"1270\" data-end=\"1282\"\u003esize up.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"1284\" data-end=\"1287\"\u003e\n\u003ch3 data-start=\"1289\" data-end=\"1297\"\u003eCare\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1298\" data-end=\"1339\"\u003eTreat it better than your credit score:\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"1340\" data-end=\"1522\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1340\" data-end=\"1373\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1342\" data-end=\"1373\"\u003eMachine wash cold, inside out\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1374\" data-end=\"1404\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1376\" data-end=\"1404\"\u003eTumble dry low or hang dry\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1405\" data-end=\"1441\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1407\" data-end=\"1441\"\u003eDon’t iron directly on the print\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1442\" data-end=\"1522\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1444\" data-end=\"1522\"\u003eDo whatever you want while it spins in the washer—just maybe don’t online shop\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"1524\" data-end=\"1527\"\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1529\" data-end=\"1681\" data-is-last-node=\"\" data-is-only-node=\"\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1529\" data-end=\"1579\"\u003eThis is your Anti-Corporate Christmas uniform.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr data-start=\"1579\" data-end=\"1582\"\u003ePunk Christmas shirt, anti-consumerism long sleeve, and a middle finger to holiday debt—all in one.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":51042403811624,"sku":"12437776354717553723","price":20.98,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":51288729616680,"sku":"17505877603485458320","price":20.98,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":51288729649448,"sku":"24293082507966690229","price":20.98,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":51288729682216,"sku":"24267801218092941553","price":20.98,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":51288729714984,"sku":"13263517477656905017","price":24.22,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":51288729747752,"sku":"37921003927507294573","price":26.37,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":51288729780520,"sku":"51548028572450150814","price":26.37,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 5XL","offer_id":51288729813288,"sku":"31112870840595749986","price":29.28,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0925\/7130\/4232\/files\/10114750855425423583_2048.jpg?v=1766249552"},{"product_id":"klf-jingle-all-the-way-to-bankruptcy-anti-corporate-christmas-long-sleeve","title":"KLF “Jingle All The Way To Bankruptcy” – Anti-Corporate Christmas Long Sleeve","description":"\u003cp data-end=\"537\" data-start=\"235\"\u003eLet’s stop pretending Christmas is magical when everyone’s just stress-sweating through a minimum payment cycle.\u003cbr data-end=\"350\" data-start=\"347\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"386\" data-start=\"350\"\u003eJingle All The Way To Bankruptcy\u003c\/strong\u003e is the official uniform for anyone who’s had enough of corporate holiday manipulation, forced cheer, and financial self-harm disguised as “tradition.”\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"754\" data-start=\"539\"\u003eFeaturing an overworked, pissed-off reindeer in a leather jacket holding a maxed-out credit card, this shirt perfectly captures the modern holiday experience: festive on the outside, existential dread on the inside. \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"880\" data-start=\"756\"\u003eWear it to your office party, your in-laws’ house, or while doomscrolling finance apps under a blanket of poor life choices. \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-end=\"885\" data-start=\"882\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-end=\"912\" data-start=\"887\"\u003e⚠️ LIMITED RUN WARNING\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1105\" data-start=\"913\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"975\" data-start=\"913\"\u003eAvailable only until January 1st — then it’s gone forever.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr data-end=\"978\" data-start=\"975\"\u003eNo reprints. No restocks. After this, you’ll have to buy it secondhand at 8x the price from someone who regrets selling theirs.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-end=\"1110\" data-start=\"1107\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-end=\"1120\" data-start=\"1112\"\u003eSpecs\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cul data-end=\"1518\" data-start=\"1121\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"1146\" data-start=\"1121\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1146\" data-start=\"1123\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"1133\" data-start=\"1123\"\u003eColor:\u003c\/strong\u003e Black only\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"1186\" data-start=\"1147\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1186\" data-start=\"1149\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"1159\" data-start=\"1149\"\u003ePrint:\u003c\/strong\u003e Full front DTF print\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"1288\" data-start=\"1187\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1288\" data-start=\"1189\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"1200\" data-start=\"1189\"\u003eFabric:\u003c\/strong\u003e 100% cotton (fiber content varies slightly by color family – black only in this drop)\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"1349\" data-start=\"1289\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1349\" data-start=\"1291\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"1302\" data-start=\"1291\"\u003eWeight:\u003c\/strong\u003e 6.0 oz\/yd² (203 g\/m²) – proper medium weight\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"1386\" data-start=\"1350\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1386\" data-start=\"1352\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"1360\" data-start=\"1352\"\u003eFit:\u003c\/strong\u003e Classic long sleeve fit\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"1409\" data-start=\"1387\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1409\" data-start=\"1389\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"1399\" data-start=\"1389\"\u003eLabel:\u003c\/strong\u003e Sewn-in\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"1518\" data-start=\"1410\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1518\" data-start=\"1412\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"1423\" data-start=\"1412\"\u003eSizing:\u003c\/strong\u003e Runs slightly smaller than standard – size up if you're between sizes or full of holiday carbs\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr data-end=\"1523\" data-start=\"1520\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-end=\"1545\" data-start=\"1525\"\u003eCare Instructions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cul data-end=\"1685\" data-start=\"1546\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"1571\" data-start=\"1546\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1571\" data-start=\"1548\"\u003eWash cold, inside-out\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"1591\" data-start=\"1572\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1591\" data-start=\"1574\"\u003eDry low or hang\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"1618\" data-start=\"1592\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1618\" data-start=\"1594\"\u003eDo not iron over print\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"1685\" data-start=\"1619\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1685\" data-start=\"1621\"\u003eDo not attempt to expense this as “holiday morale” on your taxes\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":51042412953896,"sku":"17354226672803547955","price":20.98,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":51288730173736,"sku":"12429900104887308285","price":20.98,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":51288730206504,"sku":"19963915958911802394","price":20.98,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":51288730239272,"sku":"18219384452053623800","price":20.98,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":51288730272040,"sku":"24945480818523087449","price":24.22,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":51288730304808,"sku":"18826500019317057665","price":26.37,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":51288730337576,"sku":"13773973440067088024","price":26.37,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 5XL","offer_id":51288730370344,"sku":"81975415106647370154","price":29.28,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0925\/7130\/4232\/files\/8027050373122409316_2048.jpg?v=1766249580"},{"product_id":"klf-corporate-claus-anti-corporate-christmas-long-sleeve","title":"KLF “Corporate Claus” – Anti-Corporate Christmas Long Sleeve","description":"\u003cp data-start=\"208\" data-end=\"367\"\u003eSanta didn’t sell out—he got acquired by a private equity firm, laid off the elves, outsourced the reindeer, and now he runs Christmas like a hostile takeover.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"369\" data-end=\"642\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"369\" data-end=\"394\"\u003eKLF “Corporate Claus”\u003c\/strong\u003e is the holiday shirt for anyone who knows the real Grinch is wearing a suit, not living on a mountain. This isn’t the jolly Santa from TV specials—this is the CEO of Christmas, and he’s here to turn your childhood memories into quarterly earnings.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"644\" data-end=\"740\"\u003eHe sees you when you’re sleeping.\u003cbr data-start=\"677\" data-end=\"680\"\u003eHe knows when you're broke.\u003cbr data-start=\"707\" data-end=\"710\"\u003eHe knows how to monetize both. \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"742\" data-end=\"844\"\u003eIf you’ve ever wanted to flip off holiday capitalism while still wearing a Santa hat, this is the one.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"846\" data-end=\"849\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"851\" data-end=\"875\"\u003e⚠️ LIMITED RUN NOTICE\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"876\" data-end=\"1012\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"876\" data-end=\"939\"\u003eAvailable only until midnight January 1st — then it’s dead.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr data-start=\"939\" data-end=\"942\"\u003eNo restocks. No “back by popular demand.” If you miss it, you miss it.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"1014\" data-end=\"1017\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"1019\" data-end=\"1027\"\u003eSpecs\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"1028\" data-end=\"1387\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1028\" data-end=\"1053\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1030\" data-end=\"1053\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1030\" data-end=\"1040\"\u003eColor:\u003c\/strong\u003e Black only\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1054\" data-end=\"1104\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1056\" data-end=\"1104\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1056\" data-end=\"1066\"\u003ePrint:\u003c\/strong\u003e Full front DTF (soft, durable)\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1105\" data-end=\"1206\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1107\" data-end=\"1206\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1107\" data-end=\"1118\"\u003eFabric:\u003c\/strong\u003e 100% cotton (fiber content varies slightly by color family – this drop is BLACK ONLY)\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1207\" data-end=\"1251\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1209\" data-end=\"1251\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1209\" data-end=\"1220\"\u003eWeight:\u003c\/strong\u003e Medium 6.0 oz\/yd² (203 g\/m²)\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1252\" data-end=\"1284\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1254\" data-end=\"1284\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1254\" data-end=\"1262\"\u003eFit:\u003c\/strong\u003e Classic long sleeve\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1285\" data-end=\"1307\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1287\" data-end=\"1307\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1287\" data-end=\"1297\"\u003eLabel:\u003c\/strong\u003e Sewn-in\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1308\" data-end=\"1387\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1310\" data-end=\"1387\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1310\" data-end=\"1321\"\u003eSizing:\u003c\/strong\u003e Runs slightly small – size up for comfort or boardroom domination\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"1389\" data-end=\"1392\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"1394\" data-end=\"1414\"\u003eCare Instructions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"1415\" data-end=\"1597\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1415\" data-end=\"1440\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1417\" data-end=\"1440\"\u003eWash cold, inside-out\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1441\" data-end=\"1471\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1443\" data-end=\"1471\"\u003eTumble dry low or hang dry\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1472\" data-end=\"1516\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1474\" data-end=\"1516\"\u003eDo not iron directly over the CEO’s face\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1517\" data-end=\"1597\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1519\" data-end=\"1597\"\u003eDo not wear during performance reviews unless you’re prepared for consequences\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":51046488703272,"sku":"16289007128967203532","price":20.98,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":51288730566952,"sku":"21148784660673800613","price":20.98,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":51288730599720,"sku":"14548635307024857521","price":20.98,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":51288730632488,"sku":"27853839639338868116","price":20.98,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":51288730665256,"sku":"23272386491609471621","price":24.22,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":51288730698024,"sku":"14169808686895311299","price":26.37,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":51288730730792,"sku":"10958338681242404109","price":26.37,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 5XL","offer_id":51288730763560,"sku":"11959422955481985881","price":29.28,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0925\/7130\/4232\/files\/10834787435292063661_2048.jpg?v=1766249614"},{"product_id":"klf-buy-consume-regret-repeat-anti-corporate-christmas-long-sleeve","title":"KLF “Buy. Consume. Regret. Repeat.” – Anti-Corporate Christmas Long Sleeve","description":"\u003cp data-end=\"451\" data-start=\"241\"\u003eThis isn’t a joke. This is the actual modern holiday cycle.\u003cbr data-end=\"303\" data-start=\"300\"\u003eYou buy shit you can’t afford. You chase the pressure high. You feel the shame. Then you do it again next year because the ads told you it was love.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"766\" data-start=\"453\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"492\" data-start=\"453\"\u003eKLF “Buy. Consume. Regret. Repeat.”\u003c\/strong\u003e is the Christmas shirt for people who are done pretending this whole ritual hasn’t turned into a debt-powered psychological loop. Featuring a skeletal Santa flipping capitalism the finger, this design pays tribute to everyone spiritually dead inside a Target checkout line.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"831\" data-start=\"768\"\u003eFor the record: you don’t need a new air fryer. You need a nap. \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-end=\"836\" data-start=\"833\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-end=\"855\" data-start=\"838\"\u003e⚠️ LIMITED RUN\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"980\" data-start=\"856\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"928\" data-start=\"856\"\u003eThis design is available until January 1st. After that, it vanishes.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr data-end=\"931\" data-start=\"928\"\u003eNo restocks. No second chances. No “maybe later.”\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-end=\"985\" data-start=\"982\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-end=\"995\" data-start=\"987\"\u003eSpecs\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cul data-end=\"1353\" data-start=\"996\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"1021\" data-start=\"996\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1021\" data-start=\"998\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"1008\" data-start=\"998\"\u003eColor:\u003c\/strong\u003e Black only\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"1061\" data-start=\"1022\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1061\" data-start=\"1024\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"1034\" data-start=\"1024\"\u003ePrint:\u003c\/strong\u003e Full front DTF print\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"1160\" data-start=\"1062\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1160\" data-start=\"1064\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"1075\" data-start=\"1064\"\u003eFabric:\u003c\/strong\u003e 100% cotton (fiber content may vary by color family – but this drop is BLACK ONLY)\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"1205\" data-start=\"1161\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1205\" data-start=\"1163\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"1174\" data-start=\"1163\"\u003eWeight:\u003c\/strong\u003e Medium 6.0 oz\/yd² (203 g\/m²)\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"1242\" data-start=\"1206\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1242\" data-start=\"1208\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"1216\" data-start=\"1208\"\u003eFit:\u003c\/strong\u003e Classic long sleeve fit\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"1265\" data-start=\"1243\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1265\" data-start=\"1245\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"1255\" data-start=\"1245\"\u003eLabel:\u003c\/strong\u003e Sewn-in\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"1353\" data-start=\"1266\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1353\" data-start=\"1268\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"1279\" data-start=\"1268\"\u003eSizing:\u003c\/strong\u003e Runs slightly smaller – size up if you’re between sizes or full of regret\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr data-end=\"1358\" data-start=\"1355\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-end=\"1380\" data-start=\"1360\"\u003eCare Instructions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul data-end=\"1543\" data-start=\"1381\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"1406\" data-start=\"1381\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1406\" data-start=\"1383\"\u003eWash cold, inside-out\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"1433\" data-start=\"1407\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1433\" data-start=\"1409\"\u003eTumble low or hang dry\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"1487\" data-start=\"1434\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1487\" data-start=\"1436\"\u003eDo not iron over the middle finger or Santa’s hat\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"1543\" data-start=\"1488\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1543\" data-start=\"1490\"\u003eBest paired with financial denial and holiday burnout\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":51046617612584,"sku":"16704891753870631686","price":20.98,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":51288730829096,"sku":"14010801312349144664","price":20.98,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":51288730861864,"sku":"33049446144682450153","price":20.98,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":51288730894632,"sku":"17472227067291082597","price":20.98,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":51288730927400,"sku":"24316254264082954991","price":24.22,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":51288730960168,"sku":"44876956541219208651","price":26.37,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":51288730992936,"sku":"20494760379405700094","price":26.37,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 5XL","offer_id":51288731025704,"sku":"14211513315230961319","price":29.28,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0925\/7130\/4232\/files\/7933406824543574614_2048.jpg?v=1766249637"},{"product_id":"klf-silent-night-violent-debt-anti-corporate-christmas-long-sleeve","title":"KLF “Silent Night, Violent Debt” – Anti-Corporate Christmas Long Sleeve","description":"\u003cp data-end=\"343\" data-start=\"214\"\u003eThere is no peace on earth. There is only Visa, interest rates, and the heavy sound of your credit score screaming into the void.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"597\" data-start=\"345\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"381\" data-start=\"345\"\u003eKLF “Silent Night, Violent Debt”\u003c\/strong\u003e is the holiday anthem for people who know the real miracle of Christmas is getting through December without overdrafting. Santa’s exhausted. His eyes are dead. His card is maxed out. He is every one of us right now.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"749\" data-start=\"599\"\u003eThis shirt is for the punks, the wage slaves, the financially feral, and anyone who’s ever stared at a billing statement in silent, internal violence.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"782\" data-start=\"751\"\u003eHo ho holy shit, what a season.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-end=\"787\" data-start=\"784\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-end=\"814\" data-start=\"789\"\u003e⚠️ LIMITED RUN WARNING\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"956\" data-start=\"815\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"854\" data-start=\"815\"\u003eThis design disappears January 1st.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr data-end=\"857\" data-start=\"854\"\u003eNo restocks. No weak “extended holiday sale.” When it’s gone, it’s gone like your available credit.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-end=\"961\" data-start=\"958\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-end=\"971\" data-start=\"963\"\u003eSpecs\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cul data-end=\"1361\" data-start=\"972\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"1051\" data-start=\"972\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1051\" data-start=\"974\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"984\" data-start=\"974\"\u003eColor:\u003c\/strong\u003e Black only (because festive colors are for the financially stable)\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"1089\" data-start=\"1052\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1089\" data-start=\"1054\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"1064\" data-start=\"1054\"\u003ePrint:\u003c\/strong\u003e Full front DTF print\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"1188\" data-start=\"1090\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1188\" data-start=\"1092\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"1103\" data-start=\"1092\"\u003eFabric:\u003c\/strong\u003e 100% cotton (fiber content varies slightly by color group – black only in this drop)\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"1224\" data-start=\"1189\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1224\" data-start=\"1191\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"1202\" data-start=\"1191\"\u003eWeight:\u003c\/strong\u003e 6.0 oz\/yd² (203 g\/m²)\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"1255\" data-start=\"1225\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1255\" data-start=\"1227\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"1235\" data-start=\"1227\"\u003eFit:\u003c\/strong\u003e Classic long sleeve\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"1276\" data-start=\"1256\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1276\" data-start=\"1258\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"1268\" data-start=\"1258\"\u003eLabel:\u003c\/strong\u003e Sewn-in\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"1361\" data-start=\"1277\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1361\" data-start=\"1279\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"1290\" data-start=\"1279\"\u003eSizing:\u003c\/strong\u003e Runs slightly small – size up for extra room to stress-eat gingerbread\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr data-end=\"1366\" data-start=\"1363\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-end=\"1388\" data-start=\"1368\"\u003eCare Instructions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul data-end=\"1550\" data-start=\"1389\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"1412\" data-start=\"1389\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1412\" data-start=\"1391\"\u003eWash cold, inside-out\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"1441\" data-start=\"1413\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1441\" data-start=\"1415\"\u003eTumble dry low or hang dry\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"1495\" data-start=\"1442\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1495\" data-start=\"1444\"\u003eDo not iron directly over Santa’s financial despair\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"1550\" data-start=\"1496\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1550\" data-start=\"1498\"\u003eBest worn while ignoring your email from Capital One\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":51046753501480,"sku":"33278821908370745350","price":20.98,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":51288731189544,"sku":"33122466410458599388","price":20.98,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":51288731222312,"sku":"95902901977477685402","price":20.98,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":51288731255080,"sku":"28251792820297034284","price":20.98,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":51288731287848,"sku":"10119928993566431305","price":24.22,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":51288731320616,"sku":"25010677163060652310","price":26.37,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":51288731353384,"sku":"22035721801021688721","price":26.37,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 5XL","offer_id":51288731386152,"sku":"86749676998789858613","price":29.28,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0925\/7130\/4232\/files\/12549026816000756516_2048.jpg?v=1766249671"},{"product_id":"klf-season-of-surveillance-anti-corporate-christmas-long-sleeve","title":"KLF “Season of Surveillance” – Anti-Corporate Christmas Long Sleeve","description":"\u003cp data-start=\"209\" data-end=\"416\"\u003eForget elves in the workshop — Santa’s running a data center now.\u003cbr data-start=\"274\" data-end=\"277\"\u003eThe toy list is gone. The \u003cstrong data-start=\"303\" data-end=\"329\"\u003eNaughty List Database™\u003c\/strong\u003e is live.\u003cbr data-start=\"338\" data-end=\"341\"\u003eHe sees you when you're sleeping.\u003cbr data-start=\"374\" data-end=\"377\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"377\" data-end=\"416\"\u003eHe sells your data while you dream.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"418\" data-end=\"740\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"418\" data-end=\"450\"\u003eKLF “Season of Surveillance”\u003c\/strong\u003e is the dystopian holiday truth bomb for anyone who understands that Christmas has been fully swallowed by Big Tech, Big Retail, and Big Brother. Santa is no longer magical — he’s a corporate-operated monitoring node with a headset, multiple monitors, and access to all your search history.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"742\" data-end=\"892\"\u003eThis is the perfect shirt for punks, privacy advocates, tech workers, unionizers, anarchists, and anyone who taped over their laptop camera years ago.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"894\" data-end=\"897\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"899\" data-end=\"926\"\u003e⚠️ LIMITED RUN WARNING\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"927\" data-end=\"1018\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"927\" data-end=\"970\"\u003eThis design self-destructs January 1st.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr data-start=\"970\" data-end=\"973\"\u003eNo restocks. No backorders. No FOIA requests.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"1020\" data-end=\"1023\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"1025\" data-end=\"1033\"\u003eSpecs\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"1034\" data-end=\"1374\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1034\" data-end=\"1059\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1036\" data-end=\"1059\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1036\" data-end=\"1046\"\u003eColor:\u003c\/strong\u003e Black only\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1060\" data-end=\"1099\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1062\" data-end=\"1099\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1062\" data-end=\"1072\"\u003ePrint:\u003c\/strong\u003e Full front DTF POD print\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1100\" data-end=\"1191\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1102\" data-end=\"1191\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1102\" data-end=\"1113\"\u003eFabric:\u003c\/strong\u003e 100% cotton (fiber content varies by color family – black only in this run)\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1192\" data-end=\"1229\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1194\" data-end=\"1229\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1194\" data-end=\"1205\"\u003eWeight:\u003c\/strong\u003e 6.0 oz\/yd² (203 g\/m²)\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1230\" data-end=\"1262\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1232\" data-end=\"1262\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1232\" data-end=\"1240\"\u003eFit:\u003c\/strong\u003e Classic long sleeve\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1263\" data-end=\"1285\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1265\" data-end=\"1285\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1265\" data-end=\"1275\"\u003eLabel:\u003c\/strong\u003e Sewn-in\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1286\" data-end=\"1374\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1288\" data-end=\"1374\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1288\" data-end=\"1299\"\u003eSizing:\u003c\/strong\u003e Runs slightly small — size up if you’ve gained paranoia weight since March\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"1376\" data-end=\"1379\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"1381\" data-end=\"1401\"\u003eCare Instructions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"1402\" data-end=\"1575\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1402\" data-end=\"1427\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1404\" data-end=\"1427\"\u003eWash cold, inside-out\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1428\" data-end=\"1458\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1430\" data-end=\"1458\"\u003eTumble dry low or hang dry\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1459\" data-end=\"1510\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1461\" data-end=\"1510\"\u003eDo not iron directly over the surveillance feed\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1511\" data-end=\"1575\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1513\" data-end=\"1575\"\u003eRemoving RFID tags may or may not stop Santa from tracking you\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":51046799802664,"sku":"25069178063532122860","price":20.98,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":51288731451688,"sku":"24874020482171602197","price":20.98,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":51288731484456,"sku":"10810909401441333804","price":20.98,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":51288731517224,"sku":"19897559021651276830","price":20.98,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":51288731549992,"sku":"43280558061850368536","price":24.22,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":51288731582760,"sku":"74430181183672763942","price":26.37,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":51288731615528,"sku":"13061929073032626335","price":26.37,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 5XL","offer_id":51288731648296,"sku":"62569312898466126544","price":29.28,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0925\/7130\/4232\/files\/10440778093743029316_2048.jpg?v=1766249697"},{"product_id":"klf-unwrap-your-chains-anti-corporate-christmas-long-sleeve","title":"KLF “Unwrap Your Chains” – Anti-Corporate Christmas Long Sleeve","description":"\u003cp data-start=\"221\" data-end=\"332\"\u003eEvery year they wrap a debt trap in shiny paper and call it “holiday cheer.”\u003cbr data-start=\"297\" data-end=\"300\"\u003eThis time, the gift fights back. \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"334\" data-end=\"612\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"334\" data-end=\"362\"\u003eKLF “Unwrap Your Chains”\u003c\/strong\u003e is an anti-consumerist gut punch disguised as a Christmas shirt. The present is chained shut, the lock is corporate, and the hands trying to open it aren’t even alive anymore — because capitalism doesn’t need you to live, it just needs you to spend.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"614\" data-end=\"829\"\u003eThis design is for the punks, the misfits, the radical minimalists, the financially woke, and anyone who has ever opened a gift and immediately felt the existential dread of “oh god now I owe this person something.”\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"831\" data-end=\"834\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"836\" data-end=\"863\"\u003e⚠️ LIMITED RUN WARNING\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"864\" data-end=\"999\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"864\" data-end=\"901\"\u003eAvailable ONLY until January 1st.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr data-start=\"901\" data-end=\"904\"\u003eNo restock. No reprint. No final clearance sale ironically designed to make you buy more stuff.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"1001\" data-end=\"1004\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"1006\" data-end=\"1014\"\u003eSpecs\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"1015\" data-end=\"1369\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1015\" data-end=\"1040\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1017\" data-end=\"1040\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1017\" data-end=\"1027\"\u003eColor:\u003c\/strong\u003e Black only\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1041\" data-end=\"1080\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1043\" data-end=\"1080\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1043\" data-end=\"1053\"\u003ePrint:\u003c\/strong\u003e Full front DTF POD print\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1081\" data-end=\"1184\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1083\" data-end=\"1184\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1083\" data-end=\"1094\"\u003eFabric:\u003c\/strong\u003e 100% cotton (fiber content varies slightly by color group – but this run is BLACK ONLY)\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1185\" data-end=\"1222\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1187\" data-end=\"1222\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1187\" data-end=\"1198\"\u003eWeight:\u003c\/strong\u003e 6.0 oz\/yd² (203 g\/m²)\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1223\" data-end=\"1255\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1225\" data-end=\"1255\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1225\" data-end=\"1233\"\u003eFit:\u003c\/strong\u003e Classic long sleeve\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1256\" data-end=\"1278\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1258\" data-end=\"1278\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1258\" data-end=\"1268\"\u003eLabel:\u003c\/strong\u003e Sewn-in\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1279\" data-end=\"1369\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1281\" data-end=\"1369\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1281\" data-end=\"1292\"\u003eSizing:\u003c\/strong\u003e Runs slightly small — size up if capitalism fed you too many survival snacks\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"1371\" data-end=\"1374\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"1376\" data-end=\"1396\"\u003eCare Instructions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"1397\" data-end=\"1542\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1397\" data-end=\"1422\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1399\" data-end=\"1422\"\u003eWash cold, inside-out\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1423\" data-end=\"1442\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1425\" data-end=\"1442\"\u003eDry low or hang\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1443\" data-end=\"1469\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1445\" data-end=\"1469\"\u003eDo not iron the chains\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1470\" data-end=\"1542\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1472\" data-end=\"1542\"\u003eDoes not come with bolt cutters or class consciousness (unfortunately)\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":51046813466920,"sku":"39770258959513573483","price":20.98,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":51288731910440,"sku":"14488103323648265601","price":20.98,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":51288731943208,"sku":"27950083915394473160","price":20.98,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":51288731975976,"sku":"11016739633579525890","price":20.98,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":51288732008744,"sku":"20918190875861808955","price":24.22,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":51288732041512,"sku":"31628550186369650759","price":26.37,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":51288732074280,"sku":"44060962834692673823","price":26.37,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 5XL","offer_id":51288732107048,"sku":"10658262391501245832","price":29.28,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0925\/7130\/4232\/files\/17268774242490369409_2048.jpg?v=1766250313"},{"product_id":"klf-defund-december-anti-corporate-christmas-long-sleeve","title":"KLF “Defund December” – Anti-Corporate Christmas Long Sleeve","description":"\u003cp data-start=\"217\" data-end=\"354\"\u003eDecember used to be about peace on earth.\u003cbr data-start=\"258\" data-end=\"261\"\u003eNow it’s about debt, burnout, and weaponized nostalgia being used to sell kitchen appliances.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"356\" data-end=\"714\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"356\" data-end=\"381\"\u003eKLF “Defund December”\u003c\/strong\u003e is the official protest uniform for anyone who’s tired of being emotionally manipulated into spending money they don’t have for a holiday they don’t even enjoy anymore. Santa isn’t delivering gifts — he’s picketing in front of the flaming ruins of corporate Christmas, holding a sign and a box that’s NOT full of joy, just receipts.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"716\" data-end=\"863\"\u003eThis design is loud, confrontational, and \u003cstrong data-start=\"758\" data-end=\"863\"\u003efully aligned with the real Christmas mood: exhausted, done, and ready to overthrow the entire month.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"865\" data-end=\"868\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"870\" data-end=\"897\"\u003e⚠️ LIMITED RUN WARNING\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"898\" data-end=\"1021\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"898\" data-end=\"956\"\u003eAvailable until January 1st. Then permanently retired.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr data-start=\"956\" data-end=\"959\"\u003eNo second printing. No discount bin. No “holiday encore drop.”\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"1023\" data-end=\"1026\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"1028\" data-end=\"1036\"\u003eSpecs\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"1037\" data-end=\"1377\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1037\" data-end=\"1062\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1039\" data-end=\"1062\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1039\" data-end=\"1049\"\u003eColor:\u003c\/strong\u003e Black only\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1063\" data-end=\"1102\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1065\" data-end=\"1102\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1065\" data-end=\"1075\"\u003ePrint:\u003c\/strong\u003e Full front DTF POD print\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1103\" data-end=\"1191\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1105\" data-end=\"1191\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1105\" data-end=\"1116\"\u003eFabric:\u003c\/strong\u003e 100% cotton (fiber content varies slightly – but this run is BLACK ONLY)\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1192\" data-end=\"1229\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1194\" data-end=\"1229\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1194\" data-end=\"1205\"\u003eWeight:\u003c\/strong\u003e 6.0 oz\/yd² (203 g\/m²)\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1230\" data-end=\"1262\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1232\" data-end=\"1262\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1232\" data-end=\"1240\"\u003eFit:\u003c\/strong\u003e Classic long sleeve\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1263\" data-end=\"1285\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1265\" data-end=\"1285\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1265\" data-end=\"1275\"\u003eLabel:\u003c\/strong\u003e Sewn-in\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1286\" data-end=\"1377\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1288\" data-end=\"1377\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1288\" data-end=\"1299\"\u003eSizing:\u003c\/strong\u003e Runs slightly small — size up unless you’re built like an elf on labor strike\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"1379\" data-end=\"1382\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"1384\" data-end=\"1404\"\u003eCare Instructions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"1405\" data-end=\"1588\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1405\" data-end=\"1438\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1407\" data-end=\"1438\"\u003eMachine wash cold, inside-out\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1439\" data-end=\"1469\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1441\" data-end=\"1469\"\u003eTumble dry low or hang dry\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1470\" data-end=\"1514\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1472\" data-end=\"1514\"\u003eDo not iron directly over the revolution\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1515\" data-end=\"1588\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1517\" data-end=\"1588\"\u003eWorks best while blasting Dead Kennedys and ghosting family group chats\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":51046831620392,"sku":"15921546457819025998","price":20.98,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":51288732172584,"sku":"88617490745446012779","price":20.98,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":51288732205352,"sku":"15232454114704677421","price":20.98,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":51288732238120,"sku":"32937288700251472979","price":20.98,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":51288732270888,"sku":"16229776220733050796","price":24.22,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":51288732303656,"sku":"59984434143773435775","price":26.37,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":51288732336424,"sku":"32953128713153560294","price":26.37,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 5XL","offer_id":51288732369192,"sku":"19823574924796766289","price":29.28,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0925\/7130\/4232\/files\/4238267913353552692_2048.jpg?v=1766250328"},{"product_id":"klf-holiday-spirit-has-left-the-chat-anti-corporate-christmas-long-sleeve","title":"KLF “Holiday Spirit Has Left the Chat” – Anti-Corporate Christmas Long Sleeve","description":"\u003cp data-start=\"221\" data-end=\"400\"\u003eSanta’s not jolly anymore — he’s buffering.\u003cbr data-start=\"264\" data-end=\"267\"\u003eThe holiday cheer has crashed, the loading wheel is spinning, and all that’s left is \u003cstrong data-start=\"352\" data-end=\"400\"\u003eseasonal depression with a peppermint scent.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"402\" data-end=\"626\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"402\" data-end=\"444\"\u003eKLF “Holiday Spirit Has Left the Chat”\u003c\/strong\u003e is the most relatable Christmas shirt ever printed. Tired Santa. Dead eyes. Soul logged out. No amount of sugar cookies or corporate holiday ads is bringing that spirit back online.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"628\" data-end=\"804\"\u003eThis one hits especially hard for retail workers, burned-out parents, overworked punks, tech kids, and anyone who’s ever stared at a Christmas tree and felt absolutely nothing.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"806\" data-end=\"854\"\u003eSanta didn’t leave cookies. Santa left the chat. \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"856\" data-end=\"859\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"861\" data-end=\"886\"\u003e⚠️ LIMITED RUN WARNING\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"887\" data-end=\"1015\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"887\" data-end=\"973\"\u003eOnly available until January 1st. Then Santa deletes the conversation permanently.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr data-start=\"973\" data-end=\"976\"\u003eNo reprints. No second drop. No reboot.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"1017\" data-end=\"1020\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"1022\" data-end=\"1030\"\u003eSpecs\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"1031\" data-end=\"1374\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1031\" data-end=\"1056\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1033\" data-end=\"1056\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1033\" data-end=\"1043\"\u003eColor:\u003c\/strong\u003e Black only\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1057\" data-end=\"1096\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1059\" data-end=\"1096\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1059\" data-end=\"1069\"\u003ePrint:\u003c\/strong\u003e Full front DTF print\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1097\" data-end=\"1195\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1099\" data-end=\"1195\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1099\" data-end=\"1110\"\u003eFabric:\u003c\/strong\u003e 100% cotton (fiber content varies slightly by batch – but this drop is BLACK ONLY)\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1196\" data-end=\"1233\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1198\" data-end=\"1233\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1198\" data-end=\"1209\"\u003eWeight:\u003c\/strong\u003e 6.0 oz\/yd² (203 g\/m²)\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1234\" data-end=\"1266\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1236\" data-end=\"1266\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1236\" data-end=\"1244\"\u003eFit:\u003c\/strong\u003e Classic long sleeve\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1267\" data-end=\"1289\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1269\" data-end=\"1289\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1269\" data-end=\"1279\"\u003eLabel:\u003c\/strong\u003e Sewn-in\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1290\" data-end=\"1374\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1292\" data-end=\"1374\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1292\" data-end=\"1303\"\u003eSizing:\u003c\/strong\u003e Runs slightly small — size up unless you're shaped like a 90s AIM icon\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"1376\" data-end=\"1379\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"1381\" data-end=\"1401\"\u003eCare Instructions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"1402\" data-end=\"1582\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1402\" data-end=\"1427\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1404\" data-end=\"1427\"\u003eWash cold, inside-out\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1428\" data-end=\"1458\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1430\" data-end=\"1458\"\u003eTumble dry low or hang dry\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1459\" data-end=\"1506\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1461\" data-end=\"1506\"\u003eDo not iron over Santa’s existential crisis\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1507\" data-end=\"1582\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1509\" data-end=\"1582\"\u003eWorks best when worn while ghosting group chats and ignoring family texts\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":51046833848616,"sku":"23313258096734928555","price":20.98,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":51288732533032,"sku":"86525303912873097755","price":20.98,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":51288732565800,"sku":"20365990132892368679","price":20.98,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":51288732598568,"sku":"11279875294111151596","price":20.98,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":51288732631336,"sku":"58523610228533375101","price":24.22,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":51288732664104,"sku":"86816487086867761327","price":26.37,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":51288732696872,"sku":"24569163561608355197","price":26.37,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 5XL","offer_id":51288732729640,"sku":"53706823561541204478","price":29.28,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0925\/7130\/4232\/files\/571228474645973680_2048.jpg?v=1766250341"},{"product_id":"klf-this-year-give-nothing-anti-corporate-christmas-long-sleeve","title":"KLF “This Year, Give Nothing” – Anti-Corporate Christmas Long Sleeve","description":"\u003cp data-start=\"213\" data-end=\"391\"\u003eThis year, skip the guilt. Skip the debt. Skip the capitalism wrapped in bow-patterned paper.\u003cbr data-start=\"306\" data-end=\"309\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"309\" data-end=\"326\"\u003eGive nothing.\u003c\/strong\u003e Not because you don’t care — but because you finally fucking do.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"393\" data-end=\"650\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"393\" data-end=\"426\"\u003eKLF “This Year, Give Nothing”\u003c\/strong\u003e is the Christmas refusal manifesto in shirt form. It’s quiet, bold, and brutally honest. A minimalist gift box paired with a message every burnt-out, overextended, credit-maxed human secretly wishes they could say out loud.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"652\" data-end=\"809\"\u003ePerfect for:\u003cbr data-start=\"664\" data-end=\"667\"\u003e🖤 Anti-consumerists\u003cbr data-start=\"687\" data-end=\"690\"\u003e🖤 Gift-avoiders\u003cbr data-start=\"706\" data-end=\"709\"\u003e🖤 Minimalists\u003cbr data-start=\"723\" data-end=\"726\"\u003e🖤 Rage shoppers trying to stop\u003cbr data-start=\"757\" data-end=\"760\"\u003e🖤 People whose love language is \u003cem data-start=\"793\" data-end=\"798\"\u003enot\u003c\/em\u003e capitalism\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"811\" data-end=\"884\"\u003eIf anyone complains, just tell them you’re giving the gift of resistance. \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"886\" data-end=\"889\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"891\" data-end=\"918\"\u003e⚠️ LIMITED RUN WARNING\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"919\" data-end=\"1024\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"919\" data-end=\"962\"\u003eAvailable now through January 1st ONLY.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr data-start=\"962\" data-end=\"965\"\u003eNo reprints. No “extended drop.” Once it’s gone, it’s gone.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"1026\" data-end=\"1029\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"1031\" data-end=\"1039\"\u003eSpecs\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"1040\" data-end=\"1418\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1040\" data-end=\"1065\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1042\" data-end=\"1065\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1042\" data-end=\"1052\"\u003eColor:\u003c\/strong\u003e Black only\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1066\" data-end=\"1105\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1068\" data-end=\"1105\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1068\" data-end=\"1078\"\u003ePrint:\u003c\/strong\u003e Full front DTF POD print\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1106\" data-end=\"1208\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1108\" data-end=\"1208\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1108\" data-end=\"1119\"\u003eFabric:\u003c\/strong\u003e 100% cotton (fiber content varies slightly per batch – but always BLACK for this drop)\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1209\" data-end=\"1268\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1211\" data-end=\"1268\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1211\" data-end=\"1222\"\u003eWeight:\u003c\/strong\u003e 6.0 oz\/yd² (203 g\/m²) – not thin, not bulky\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1269\" data-end=\"1301\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1271\" data-end=\"1301\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1271\" data-end=\"1279\"\u003eFit:\u003c\/strong\u003e Classic long sleeve\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1302\" data-end=\"1324\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1304\" data-end=\"1324\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1304\" data-end=\"1314\"\u003eLabel:\u003c\/strong\u003e Sewn-in\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1325\" data-end=\"1418\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1327\" data-end=\"1418\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1327\" data-end=\"1338\"\u003eSizing:\u003c\/strong\u003e Runs slightly small — size up if you’re trying to hide from holiday obligations\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"1420\" data-end=\"1423\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"1425\" data-end=\"1445\"\u003eCare Instructions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"1446\" data-end=\"1603\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1446\" data-end=\"1479\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1448\" data-end=\"1479\"\u003eMachine wash cold, inside-out\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1480\" data-end=\"1510\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1482\" data-end=\"1510\"\u003eTumble dry low or hang dry\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1511\" data-end=\"1548\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1513\" data-end=\"1548\"\u003eDo not iron the righteous message\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1549\" data-end=\"1603\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1551\" data-end=\"1603\"\u003eBest worn while ignoring everyone’s Amazon wish list\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":51046857802024,"sku":"15849522676881122769","price":20.98,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":51283811369256,"sku":"51309709293404683589","price":20.98,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":51283811402024,"sku":"20820521763869028488","price":20.98,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":51283811434792,"sku":"36441762319432847604","price":20.98,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":51283811467560,"sku":"33049962150817051175","price":24.22,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":51283811500328,"sku":"26619119286680064834","price":26.37,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":51283811533096,"sku":"26247751182646550157","price":26.37,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 5XL","offer_id":51283811565864,"sku":"72200395457995133144","price":29.28,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0925\/7130\/4232\/files\/7431952975630890048_2048.jpg?v=1766061856"},{"product_id":"klf-debt-machine-santa-anti-corporate-christmas-long-sleeve","title":"KLF “Debt Machine Santa” – Anti-Corporate Christmas Long Sleeve","description":"\u003cp data-start=\"233\" data-end=\"339\"\u003eSanta isn’t making toys anymore — he \u003cem data-start=\"270\" data-end=\"274\"\u003eis\u003c\/em\u003e the card reader now.\u003cbr data-start=\"295\" data-end=\"298\"\u003eInsert card. Confirm purchase. Cry later.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"341\" data-end=\"591\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"341\" data-end=\"369\"\u003eKLF “Debt Machine Santa”\u003c\/strong\u003e is the perfect Christmas shirt for anyone who’s ever stood at a checkout terminal whispering “please go through” like it’s a prayer while pretending holiday spending is normal and not a slow-motion financial suicide pact.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"593\" data-end=\"817\"\u003eThis design puts it all out in the open: Santa is no longer magical — he’s a walking, blinking, transaction-processing artifact of late-stage capitalism. He’s the spirit of Christmas debt, and he requires PIN authentication.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"819\" data-end=\"981\"\u003eWear it to the mall. Wear it to family gatherings. Wear it every time someone says “it’s not about the gifts” while swiping a credit card for $700 worth of gifts.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"983\" data-end=\"986\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"988\" data-end=\"1015\"\u003e⚠️ LIMITED RUN WARNING\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1016\" data-end=\"1150\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1016\" data-end=\"1053\"\u003eAvailable only until January 1st. \u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr data-start=\"1053\" data-end=\"1056\"\u003eAfter that, Santa’s shutting down the terminal permanently. No reprints. No reruns. No Klarna.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"1152\" data-end=\"1155\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"1157\" data-end=\"1165\"\u003eSpecs\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"1166\" data-end=\"1514\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1166\" data-end=\"1191\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1168\" data-end=\"1191\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1168\" data-end=\"1178\"\u003eColor:\u003c\/strong\u003e Black only\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1192\" data-end=\"1231\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1194\" data-end=\"1231\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1194\" data-end=\"1204\"\u003ePrint:\u003c\/strong\u003e Full front DTF POD print\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1232\" data-end=\"1322\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1234\" data-end=\"1322\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1234\" data-end=\"1245\"\u003eFabric:\u003c\/strong\u003e 100% cotton (fiber content varies slightly – but black only for this drop)\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1323\" data-end=\"1360\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1325\" data-end=\"1360\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1325\" data-end=\"1336\"\u003eWeight:\u003c\/strong\u003e 6.0 oz\/yd² (203 g\/m²)\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1361\" data-end=\"1393\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1363\" data-end=\"1393\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1363\" data-end=\"1371\"\u003eFit:\u003c\/strong\u003e Classic long sleeve\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1394\" data-end=\"1416\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1396\" data-end=\"1416\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1396\" data-end=\"1406\"\u003eLabel:\u003c\/strong\u003e Sewn-in\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1417\" data-end=\"1514\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1419\" data-end=\"1514\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1419\" data-end=\"1430\"\u003eSizing:\u003c\/strong\u003e Runs slightly small — size up unless your bank account shrunk enough to make it fit\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"1516\" data-end=\"1519\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"1521\" data-end=\"1541\"\u003eCare Instructions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"1542\" data-end=\"1687\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1542\" data-end=\"1567\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1544\" data-end=\"1567\"\u003eWash cold, inside-out\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1568\" data-end=\"1598\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1570\" data-end=\"1598\"\u003eTumble dry low or hang dry\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1599\" data-end=\"1625\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1601\" data-end=\"1625\"\u003eDo not iron the keypad\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1626\" data-end=\"1687\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1628\" data-end=\"1687\"\u003eRemoving the shirt will not remove your debt, unfortunately\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":51046876512552,"sku":"23744891994035332490","price":20.98,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":51283811041576,"sku":"76102243877299235656","price":20.98,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":51283811074344,"sku":"39126813437802203571","price":20.98,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":51283811107112,"sku":"70439909216365990839","price":20.98,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":51283811139880,"sku":"12737825242053134315","price":24.22,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":51283811172648,"sku":"25815498938748827330","price":26.37,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":51283811205416,"sku":"17837901336685073721","price":26.37,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 5XL","offer_id":51283811238184,"sku":"25631436985358600818","price":29.28,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0925\/7130\/4232\/files\/7987110774873804857_2048.jpg?v=1766061831"},{"product_id":"klf-in-case-of-christmas-break-glass-anti-corporate-christmas-long-sleeve","title":"KLF “In Case of Christmas, Break Glass” – Anti-Corporate Christmas Long Sleeve","description":"\u003cp data-start=\"244\" data-end=\"319\"\u003eEvery mall has an emergency fire box.\u003cbr data-start=\"281\" data-end=\"284\"\u003eEvery punk needs one for Christmas.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"321\" data-end=\"541\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"321\" data-end=\"364\"\u003eKLF “In Case of Christmas, Break Glass”\u003c\/strong\u003e is a public safety notice for the real world: one box contains a credit card, the other contains alcohol, and your emotional stability depends on which one you reach for first.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"543\" data-end=\"742\"\u003eThis design is part parody, part cry for help, and part truth about what the holidays do to normal people just trying to survive a month of forced spending, forced smiles, and forced “holiday cheer.”\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"744\" data-end=\"785\"\u003eIt’s not a sweater — it’s a survival kit. \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"787\" data-end=\"957\"\u003ePerfect for:\u003cbr data-start=\"799\" data-end=\"802\"\u003e🔹 Retail workers\u003cbr data-start=\"819\" data-end=\"822\"\u003e🔹 Bartenders\u003cbr data-start=\"835\" data-end=\"838\"\u003e🔹 People who count down to December 26th\u003cbr data-start=\"879\" data-end=\"882\"\u003e🔹 Anyone who considers “holiday coping strategy” to be a personality trait\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"959\" data-end=\"962\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"964\" data-end=\"991\"\u003e⚠️ LIMITED RUN WARNING\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"992\" data-end=\"1130\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"992\" data-end=\"1065\"\u003eAvailable only until January 1st. Then the glass gets sealed forever.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr data-start=\"1065\" data-end=\"1068\"\u003eNo restocks. No extra “holiday extension.” No alternate print.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"1132\" data-end=\"1135\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"1137\" data-end=\"1145\"\u003eSpecs\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"1146\" data-end=\"1481\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1146\" data-end=\"1171\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1148\" data-end=\"1171\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1148\" data-end=\"1158\"\u003eColor:\u003c\/strong\u003e Black only\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1172\" data-end=\"1211\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1174\" data-end=\"1211\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1174\" data-end=\"1184\"\u003ePrint:\u003c\/strong\u003e Full front DTF POD print\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1212\" data-end=\"1299\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1214\" data-end=\"1299\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1214\" data-end=\"1225\"\u003eFabric:\u003c\/strong\u003e 100% cotton (fiber content may vary slightly – black only in this drop)\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1300\" data-end=\"1337\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1302\" data-end=\"1337\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1302\" data-end=\"1313\"\u003eWeight:\u003c\/strong\u003e 6.0 oz\/yd² (203 g\/m²)\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1338\" data-end=\"1370\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1340\" data-end=\"1370\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1340\" data-end=\"1348\"\u003eFit:\u003c\/strong\u003e Classic long sleeve\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1371\" data-end=\"1393\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1373\" data-end=\"1393\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1373\" data-end=\"1383\"\u003eLabel:\u003c\/strong\u003e Sewn-in\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1394\" data-end=\"1481\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1396\" data-end=\"1481\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1396\" data-end=\"1407\"\u003eSizing:\u003c\/strong\u003e Runs slightly small — size up unless you're already emotionally shrinking\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"1483\" data-end=\"1486\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"1488\" data-end=\"1508\"\u003eCare Instructions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"1509\" data-end=\"1707\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1509\" data-end=\"1542\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1511\" data-end=\"1542\"\u003eMachine wash cold, inside-out\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1543\" data-end=\"1573\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1545\" data-end=\"1573\"\u003eTumble dry low or hang dry\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1574\" data-end=\"1616\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1576\" data-end=\"1616\"\u003eDo not iron the emergency instructions\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1617\" data-end=\"1707\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1619\" data-end=\"1707\"\u003eBreaking actual glass while wearing this shirt is not recommended but extremely on-brand\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":51046879789352,"sku":"16197135765126911366","price":20.98,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0925\/7130\/4232\/files\/13634931127151053351_2048.jpg?v=1763481468"},{"product_id":"klf-jolly-no-just-dissociating-anti-corporate-christmas-long-sleeve","title":"KLF “Jolly? No. Just Dissociating.” – Anti-Corporate Christmas Long Sleeve","description":"\u003cp data-start=\"244\" data-end=\"370\"\u003eEveryone else is “in the holiday spirit.”\u003cbr data-start=\"285\" data-end=\"288\"\u003eYou? You left your body sometime around the first Christmas commercial in October. \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"372\" data-end=\"604\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"372\" data-end=\"411\"\u003eKLF “Jolly? No. Just Dissociating.”\u003c\/strong\u003e is the truest shirt ever made for anyone emotionally checked-out during the most overhyped month of the year. Santa’s thousand-yard stare says everything you’ve been too tired to say out loud.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"606\" data-end=\"829\"\u003eThis is the shirt for:\u003cbr\u003e🖤 Retail workers on shift #27\u003cbr data-start=\"659\" data-end=\"662\"\u003e🖤 Parents running on guilt and caffeine\u003cbr data-start=\"702\" data-end=\"705\"\u003e🖤 Kids who unplugged from reality to survive family gatherings\u003cbr data-start=\"768\" data-end=\"771\"\u003e🖤 People who have mentally evacuated the holiday entirely\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"831\" data-end=\"884\"\u003eIt’s not festive. It’s not “cute.” It’s \u003cstrong data-start=\"871\" data-end=\"884\"\u003eaccurate.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"886\" data-end=\"889\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"891\" data-end=\"918\"\u003e⚠️ LIMITED RUN WARNING\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"919\" data-end=\"1065\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"919\" data-end=\"956\"\u003eAvailable ONLY until January 1st.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr data-start=\"956\" data-end=\"959\"\u003eAfter that, we dissociate this design from existence. No re-release. No archived drop. No “holiday remix.”\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"1067\" data-end=\"1070\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"1072\" data-end=\"1080\"\u003eSpecs\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"1081\" data-end=\"1442\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1081\" data-end=\"1106\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1083\" data-end=\"1106\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1083\" data-end=\"1093\"\u003eColor:\u003c\/strong\u003e Black only\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1107\" data-end=\"1146\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1109\" data-end=\"1146\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1109\" data-end=\"1119\"\u003ePrint:\u003c\/strong\u003e Full front DTF POD print\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1147\" data-end=\"1244\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1149\" data-end=\"1244\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1149\" data-end=\"1160\"\u003eFabric:\u003c\/strong\u003e 100% cotton (fiber content varies slightly by batch – but this run is BLACK ONLY)\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1245\" data-end=\"1282\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1247\" data-end=\"1282\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1247\" data-end=\"1258\"\u003eWeight:\u003c\/strong\u003e 6.0 oz\/yd² (203 g\/m²)\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1283\" data-end=\"1319\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1285\" data-end=\"1319\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1285\" data-end=\"1293\"\u003eFit:\u003c\/strong\u003e Classic long sleeve fit\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1320\" data-end=\"1342\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1322\" data-end=\"1342\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1322\" data-end=\"1332\"\u003eLabel:\u003c\/strong\u003e Sewn-in\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1343\" data-end=\"1442\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1345\" data-end=\"1442\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1345\" data-end=\"1356\"\u003eSizing:\u003c\/strong\u003e Runs slightly small — size up unless you’ve emotionally vaporized your corporeal form\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"1444\" data-end=\"1447\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"1449\" data-end=\"1469\"\u003eCare Instructions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"1470\" data-end=\"1649\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1470\" data-end=\"1503\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1472\" data-end=\"1503\"\u003eMachine wash cold, inside-out\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1504\" data-end=\"1534\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1506\" data-end=\"1534\"\u003eTumble dry low or hang dry\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1535\" data-end=\"1582\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1537\" data-end=\"1582\"\u003eDo not iron over the existential disconnect\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1583\" data-end=\"1649\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1585\" data-end=\"1649\"\u003eWorks best when worn while staring blankly at holiday gatherings\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":51046888636712,"sku":"13148408922318761937","price":20.98,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":51283810648360,"sku":"23156379926512604384","price":20.98,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":51283810681128,"sku":"13079311146705293882","price":20.98,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":51283810713896,"sku":"68985102003541844998","price":20.98,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":51283810746664,"sku":"11113175555014588849","price":24.22,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":51283810779432,"sku":"13793060163021309927","price":26.37,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":51283810812200,"sku":"12113022752243242445","price":26.37,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 5XL","offer_id":51283810844968,"sku":"33067026531525556405","price":29.28,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0925\/7130\/4232\/files\/5792958466310453306_2048.jpg?v=1766061813"},{"product_id":"klf-holiday-cheer-is-a-scam-anti-corporate-christmas-long-sleeve","title":"KLF “Holiday Cheer Is a Scam” – Anti-Corporate Christmas Long Sleeve","description":"\u003cp data-start=\"247\" data-end=\"445\"\u003eThey told you to believe in the magic of Christmas.\u003cbr data-start=\"298\" data-end=\"301\"\u003eThey forgot to mention the \u003cstrong data-start=\"328\" data-end=\"397\"\u003einterest rates, emotional manipulation, and psychological warfare\u003c\/strong\u003e used to sell that magic back to you at 30% APR.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"447\" data-end=\"662\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"447\" data-end=\"480\"\u003eKLF “Holiday Cheer Is a Scam”\u003c\/strong\u003e pulls the curtain back on the entire operation: the ads, the sales, the fake joy, the seasonal pressure, the debt, the guilt — all dressed up in twinkling lights and nostalgia bait.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"664\" data-end=\"826\"\u003eThis shirt is for the ones who finally figured it out: \u003cbr\u003e🖤 Holiday cheer isn’t free\u003cbr data-start=\"746\" data-end=\"749\"\u003e🖤 It’s marketed\u003cbr data-start=\"765\" data-end=\"768\"\u003e🖤 It’s monetized\u003cbr data-start=\"785\" data-end=\"788\"\u003e🖤 And it sure as hell isn’t mandatory\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"828\" data-end=\"946\"\u003eWear this when you need the world to know you’re done being emotionally waterboarded by jingles and fake Hallmark joy.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"948\" data-end=\"951\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"953\" data-end=\"980\"\u003e⚠️ LIMITED RUN WARNING\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"981\" data-end=\"1084\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"981\" data-end=\"1012\"\u003eThis drop ends January 1st.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr data-start=\"1012\" data-end=\"1015\"\u003eNo reruns. No post-holiday clearance sale. No scammy “extended drop.”\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"1086\" data-end=\"1089\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"1091\" data-end=\"1099\"\u003eSpecs\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"1100\" data-end=\"1450\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1100\" data-end=\"1125\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1102\" data-end=\"1125\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1102\" data-end=\"1112\"\u003eColor:\u003c\/strong\u003e Black only\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1126\" data-end=\"1165\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1128\" data-end=\"1165\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1128\" data-end=\"1138\"\u003ePrint:\u003c\/strong\u003e Full front DTF POD print\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1166\" data-end=\"1257\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1168\" data-end=\"1257\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1168\" data-end=\"1179\"\u003eFabric:\u003c\/strong\u003e 100% cotton (fiber content varies slightly – black only in this collection)\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1258\" data-end=\"1295\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1260\" data-end=\"1295\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1260\" data-end=\"1271\"\u003eWeight:\u003c\/strong\u003e 6.0 oz\/yd² (203 g\/m²)\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1296\" data-end=\"1328\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1298\" data-end=\"1328\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1298\" data-end=\"1306\"\u003eFit:\u003c\/strong\u003e Classic long sleeve\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1329\" data-end=\"1351\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1331\" data-end=\"1351\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1331\" data-end=\"1341\"\u003eLabel:\u003c\/strong\u003e Sewn-in\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1352\" data-end=\"1450\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1354\" data-end=\"1450\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1354\" data-end=\"1365\"\u003eSizing:\u003c\/strong\u003e Runs slightly small — size up if you carry the weight of generational disappointment\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"1452\" data-end=\"1455\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"1457\" data-end=\"1477\"\u003eCare Instructions\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"1478\" data-end=\"1626\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1478\" data-end=\"1511\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1480\" data-end=\"1511\"\u003eMachine wash cold, inside-out\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1512\" data-end=\"1542\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1514\" data-end=\"1542\"\u003eTumble dry low or hang dry\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1543\" data-end=\"1573\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1545\" data-end=\"1573\"\u003eDo not iron over the truth\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1574\" data-end=\"1626\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1576\" data-end=\"1626\"\u003eBest worn while declining Secret Santa invitations\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":51046896206120,"sku":"51660101427594639874","price":20.98,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":51289282674984,"sku":"27747452560432371993","price":20.98,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":51289282707752,"sku":"19358154192365585311","price":20.98,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":51289282740520,"sku":"24055817754670116825","price":20.98,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":51289282773288,"sku":"26705837143581655511","price":24.22,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":51289282806056,"sku":"29024375282519731372","price":26.37,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 4XL","offer_id":51289282838824,"sku":"18497936949429398340","price":26.37,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 5XL","offer_id":51289282871592,"sku":"13510493684876829418","price":29.28,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0925\/7130\/4232\/files\/11793111372495748322_2048.jpg?v=1766320804"}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0925\/7130\/4232\/collections\/ChatGPT_Image_Nov_18_2025_11_11_11_AM_1_1.webp?v=1765029098","url":"https:\/\/kuntsliveforever.com\/collections\/anti-corporate-christmas.oembed","provider":"Kunts Live Forever","version":"1.0","type":"link"}