{"product_id":"everybody-gets-off-eventually","title":"Everybody Gets Off Eventually","description":"\u003cp class=\"PDq2pG_selectionAnchorContainer\" data-start=\"518\" data-end=\"552\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"518\" data-end=\"552\"\u003eEVERYBODY GETS OFF EVENTUALLY.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"557\" data-end=\"676\"\u003eWelcome to the midway where nobody checks the safety bar and the ride operator has been dead for at least thirty years.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"681\" data-end=\"991\"\u003eA massive skeletal Ferris wheel turns beneath a radioactive pink moon, packed with passengers who apparently bought the unlimited ride pass. Down below, the freakshow is still open, the ticket booth is still taking money, and the carnival lights keep glowing like absolutely nothing horrible has happened here.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"996\" data-end=\"1230\"\u003eThis is carnival horror dragged through the KLF gutter...punk skeletons, filthy midway lights, creepy tents, skulls, bones, terrible signage, and enough questionable maintenance to make getting on the ride an act of blind fucking faith.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1235\" data-end=\"1423\"\u003eMade for carnival freaks, horror junkies, punk misfits, and anyone who has ever handed cash to a stranger operating a machine that arrived in town on the back of a truck six hours earlier.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1428\" data-end=\"1583\"\u003eBuy the ticket. Ignore the inspection sticker. Pull down the safety bar and try not to think too hard about why everyone already on the ride is a skeleton.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1588\" data-end=\"1662\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1588\" data-end=\"1662\"\u003eEverybody gets off eventually. Nobody said what condition you’d be in.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEU representative\u003c\/strong\u003e: HONSON VENTURES LIMITED, gpsr@honsonventures.com, 3, Gnaftis House flat 102, Limassol, Mesa Geitonia, 4003, CY\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eProduct information\u003c\/strong\u003e: Gildan 64000, 2 year warranty in EU and Northern Ireland as per Directive 1999\/44\/EC\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWarnings, Hazard\u003c\/strong\u003e: For adults, Made in Bangladesh\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCare instructions\u003c\/strong\u003e: Machine wash: cold (max 30C or 90F), with similar colors , Do not bleach, Tumble dry: low heat, Iron, steam or dry: low heat, Do not dryclean\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"S \/ Black","offer_id":52376358125864,"sku":"17874107972147940005","price":28.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Black","offer_id":52376358158632,"sku":"77690614834907718235","price":28.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Black","offer_id":52376358191400,"sku":"25515354167521982817","price":28.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Black","offer_id":52376358224168,"sku":"16024208972337829793","price":28.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Black","offer_id":52376358256936,"sku":"21256599857564164771","price":30.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0925\/7130\/4232\/files\/10611345180396285422_2048.jpg?v=1789278693","url":"https:\/\/kuntsliveforever.com\/products\/everybody-gets-off-eventually","provider":"Kunts Live Forever","version":"1.0","type":"link"}