{"product_id":"restricted-area-bathrobe","title":"Restricted Area Bathrobe","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eAUTHORIZED PERSONNEL ONLY. Pants apparently require higher clearance.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eThe \u003cstrong\u003eKLF Restricted Area Bathrobe\u003c\/strong\u003e takes Blackout Division completely off duty without making it any less suspicious.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eThe all-over artwork covers the robe in distressed \u003cstrong\u003eRESTRICTED AREA\u003c\/strong\u003e warnings, classified stamps, skull files, surveillance targets, barcodes, crosshairs, chain-link fencing, hazard symbols, serial numbers, corrupted documents, and battered KLF graphics. Black and charcoal dominate the design while dirty white, gray, and warning red break through the darker layers like pieces of a classified file that should have stayed shredded.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eLook closer and you'll find fragments including \u003cstrong\u003e“Restricted Area,” “Authorized Personnel Only,” “Classified,” “Black Ops,”\u003c\/strong\u003e and \u003cstrong\u003e“No Records”\u003c\/strong\u003e scattered throughout the pattern. Identification numbers, targeting marks, restricted-access graphics, and overlapping files give the robe enough detail that you'll probably notice something different every time you put it on.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eThe relaxed robe silhouette makes the whole concept considerably more ridiculous in exactly the right way: all the visual seriousness of a restricted black-site document wrapped around somebody wandering through the house looking for snacks.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eThis isn't official military, government, or agency merchandise. \u003cstrong\u003eRestricted Area belongs to KLF's fictional Blackout Division universe\u003c\/strong\u003e—surveillance, disappearing records, controlled information, questionable authority, and absolutely no explanation for why you're wearing classified documents before breakfast.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eFor late nights, lazy mornings, horror marathons, questionable houseguests, and maintaining operational security between the bedroom and the refrigerator.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eMission status: classified.\u003cbr\u003eDress code: apparently optional.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eDesigned by \u003cstrong\u003eRose Baxter\u003c\/strong\u003e for \u003cstrong\u003eKunts Live Forever\u003c\/strong\u003e.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Kunts Live Forever","offers":[{"title":"Default","offer_id":67614780555560,"sku":"q2nc41d2_001","price":25.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0925\/7130\/4232\/files\/b261ef042ac642709aaf9847dcbf8bb3.jpg?v=1790580325","url":"https:\/\/kuntsliveforever.com\/products\/restricted-area-bathrobe","provider":"Kunts Live Forever","version":"1.0","type":"link"}